Sir
3:2-6, 12-14; Col 3:12-21; Lk 2:41-52
One day a little girl was sitting
and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly
noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in
contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and
inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?”
Her mother replied, "Well,
every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my
hair turns white.”
The little girl thought about this
revelation for a while and then said, "Mom, how come all of grandma's
hairs are white?”
(The story is
from an unknown author)
The first Sunday
after Christmas is the feast of the Holy Family of Joseph, Mary and Jesus. The
Holy Family provides us with a beautiful model of an ideal Christian family. We
see in the person of Joseph an ideal husband and father – one who is
God-fearing, just and righteous, silent worker, good provider and protector; in
Mary, we find an ideal wife and mother – one who is prayerful, simple, good
listener, attentive and kind-hearted; and in Jesus, we have an ideal child –
one who is obedient, respectful and gracious.
The readings give
us at least three essential ingredients of a Christian or a holy family. First,
for a family to be holy, members must put God at the centermost part of their
lives. In the time of Jesus, religious practices, like the Feast of Passover,
were people's ways of acknowledging their dependence on God. Regularly, the
family of Joseph, Mary and Jesus, like other Jewish families, would go to the
synagogue or to the temple to worship and honor God. They had come to believe
that without God they could not survive and flourish as a people.
It is the supreme
duty of parents to educate their children, especially in the knowledge of God.
Parents are the first evangelizers, the first catechists to their children.
They are to lead their children in praying and in participating actively every
Sunday worship. Their kind words and actions would facilitate their children's
understanding of how loving and gracious is our Father in heaven.
Second, for a
family to be Christian, members must show respect and love for one another.
Saint Paul says: “Wives be subordinate to your husbands, as is proper in the
Lord” (Col 3:18). Husbands are the head of the family, but they rule by
serving. In his letter to the Ephesians, Paul clearly states: “Husbands, love
your wives, even as Christ loved the Church” (5:25). Just as Christ offered his
entire life for the good of the Church, husbands also must give themselves in
service to their family.
The love and
respect that married couples give to one another is crucial to the total
maturation of children. Experience would tell us that children who grew up from
loving families are most likely to become good citizens and to succeed in life.
While those who are brought up in a troubled or dysfunctional families
would easily become problematic and
destructive.
Together, spouses
have to bring up their children kindly. In giving discipline, parents must
avoid inflicting physical and emotional harm to their children. In the gospel,
Mary and Joseph express to the young Jesus their deep concern as parents in a
very respectful manner: “Son, why have you
done this to us? Your father and I have been looking for you with great
anxiety” (Lk 2:48). Often, polite words would be enough to make children
understand parental love.
By obeying parents, children
would please the Lord (Col 3:20). The first reading says that those who honor
parents would be rewarded and cleansed from their sins (Sir 3:3-6). Kindness
toward old people would remain in God’s memory (Sir 3:14).
And third, for a family to be
holy, members must be willing to forgive one another’s fault. Saint Paul
encourages families to maintain the virtues of compassion, kindness, humility,
gentleness, and patience. They are to bear with one another and forgive one
another. If one has a grievance against another, he must emulate the Lord by
extending unconditional forgiveness (Col 3:13).
Conflicts
among members in a family are quite common nowadays. In this modern and
excessively materialistic world, emotional bonds between married couples,
between siblings and between cousins are greatly weakened. The nature of our
jobs, businesses and even recreation have affected seriously the amount and
quality of time we give to each other. If there is no strong emotional bond
between members in a family, what would keep them meaningfully together?
The
holy family of Joseph, Mary and Jesus would remind us that true joy and
happiness is only possible when there is intimacy and affection between people.
Let us not allow material things and our desire for wealth to take away our
time for each other. Whenever there is conflict in our family, let us be first to
extend a reconciling hand, regardless of who is the offender and the offended
party. May we always remember that good relationships are much more important
than money and any material possession.
A little boy greets his father as he returns from work with
a question: “Daddy, how much do you make an hour?” The father is surprised and
says, “Look, son, not even your mother knows. Don’t bother me now, I’m tired.”
“But Daddy, just tell me please! How much do you make an hour?” the boy
insists. The father finally gives up and replies, “Twenty dollars.” “Okay,
Daddy,” the boy continues, “Could you loan me ten dollars?” The father yells at
him, “So that was the reason you asked how much I earn, right? Now, go to sleep
and don’t bother me anymore!”
At night the father thinks over what he said and starts
feeling guilty. Maybe his son needed to buy something. Finally, he goes to his
son's room. “Are you asleep, son?” asks the father. “No, Daddy. Why?” replies
the boy. “Here's the money you asked for earlier,” the father said. “Thanks,
Daddy!” replies the boy and receives the money. The he reaches under his pillow
and brings out some more money. “Now I have enough! Now I have twenty dollars!”
says the boy to his father, “Daddy, could you sell me one hour of your time?”
(The story is from an unknown author)
